Thanksgiving Part II

After Barksdale licked me in the teeth, she followed me into the bathroom and proceeded to drink out of the toilet. Apparently the toilet water at my parent's house is more tastey than our toilet water.

Thanksgiving

Quote from the Mom about Barksdale:

"Can you please just give her the entire house and quit calling her back to you? I don't want her to think Grandma's house is boring."

Five minutes later, we find her eating eggshells from my mom's potted plants compost.

Lesson Learned

Not more putting Ender on down stays on grass. Because when the couple with the beagle is determined to meet your dog and continue to be so even though you specifically said THEY CAN'T MEET, you'll need some traction. Instead you'll just end up with a mouth full of fur and an ass full of grass.

Carpet Spot Cleaner

In dire need of a good carpet spot cleaner. Recommendations interwebs?

Food Challenges

The past five months of radio silence have been filled with work, travel, and more food challenges.

A few months ago, Barksdale started having diarrhea. We chalked that up to just something random she ate off the ground. A few days later, Ender started having diarrhea. Now we were having two dogs with epic dumps which included some accidents in the house. Thinking that we purchased a bad bag of dog food, we repurchased another bag. Same thing. We knew it was the food since their diarrhea subsided when we implemented a three meal fast for the dogs.

So being shaken out of the same ol' same ol' by the stench of poo, we made the decision to change their dog good. We switched from Natural Balance Sweet Potato and Venison to California Natural Grain Free Lamb.

And holy moly has the change been awesome. They have been on the new food for about a month and the pros so far include:

1. No more stinky butt
2. No more epic farting

The downside is that pet food stores do not regularly carry this product. Therefore we have become one of "those people" and specially order our dog food. Because of this we have stopped shopping at Pet Club and now purchase our food from Dog Bone Alley, which will accept dog food returns in cases of epic diarrhea.

Neighborhood Cat

So this cat has been running around our neighborhood for quite some time now. We have found him in the strangest of places (i.e. our lobby which has locked doors) but it is not until recently that he finally got tags. So curiosity got the best of me and I finally took a peek. Can you guess his name?

Dot?
Checkers?

It's Sergio.

Bad Rap Open House

The great thing about living in the Bay Area is being so close to a lot of wonderful dog resources. The bf and I made it out to the most recent Bad Rap open house and it really confirmed how batshit crazy our dogs were.

There were about 10+ dogs from the Berkeley Animal Shelter in the middle of training class and I completely fell in love with a dog named Brando. And that only affirmed the bf's theory that I like the crazy dogs. I would like to take this opportunity to defend myself and say, I like dogs who are "independent". Which I guess could also mean stubborn and aggravating. Anyway, Brando, compared our own dogs, is not crazy. During the class and the post class meet and greet, he was extremely calm and did not jump at anyone's faces. I told Barksdale that if she pee'd in the stairwell one more time, I was going to trade her in for Brando. So her only hope is if someone adopts him first. Here's his profile:

http://norcalpetadoptions.com/pets/detail/9947

Ender in Flight

Photos like these make cutting the monthly check to the dog walker a little more bearable. Also, the bf says I'm "busted" for the previous post but I did point out to him that he was the one that pointed the shirt out to me and chuckled. So there.

Um, hello....

Product Reivew: Nature's Animals Bakery Biscuits

The best thing about these things is that they are literally the size of my arm. Well maybe my hand (four inches?). This means that I have finally found a treat that can't be consumed with one bite. The dogs actually have to take like THREE bites. The worst thing about these treats is that there's probably like only 10 in each bag. However, this might be counteracted by the "handmade" and "fresh baked" labels. All I know is that Barksdale didn't get the runs after eating it and that makes this a-okay in my book. These biscuits are from Nature's Animals and apparently they make a Big Bite biscuit that is EIGHT inches. Lord in heaven, please let me stumble upon these at least once in my lifetime.

Barksdale has (a) Friend too!

Evidence that Barksdale also has a friend.

Ender has Friends!

Well, one friend.

Dating Services

My friend and I had been discussing the issue of dating and pet ownership for as long a she has owned her pet. One of her requirements is that he must love dogs. Especially her dog.

We've never had this problem since the bf and I acquired our pets together. Although the idea of trying to find a significant other with Ender in tow has probably helped us resolve our differences much quicker.

Anyway, while reading the news, I came across this website called Date My Pet. It is a brilliant idea and I wish I would have thought of it myself.

Yo, Wassup

Thundershirt?

In my blog surfing, I came across this post about ThunderShirts:

http://daisyjd.com/index.php/2011/03/rhett-butler-his-thundershirt/

Apparently this "shirt" is akin to swaddling and is supposed to help your dog with anxiety and what not. I am thisclose to getting one for Ender.

http://www.thundershirt.com/

Report Card

Ender's report card for 3/22:

"Ender found a deer skull today! He carried it around for a while. I thought it was just a stick. He was pretty disappointed when I took it away."

Hmm...doesn't he realize that he kisses his mama with that mouth?

THE Question

Why do people ask "Is your dog friendly?" as opposed to "Can I pet your dog?"...? (Is ?"? gramatically kosher? I don't know.)

Look people, I know what you mean when you ask me if my dog is friendly? It means you want to pet him. So why don't you ask if you can pet my dog? Because then this gives me the chance to say no when I see him obviously enter into his caraaazzyy zone. Part of it is on me because I never know what to say. I could say no, but I feel like that's just selling Ender short. He's friendly, but also so so crazy. But when I try to respond, I usually get as far as "He's friendly, but....." before they go in for the the kill.

I was putting Ender in a down to wait for a small white poodle to pass when the poodle owner asked if Ender was friendly. And my suspicious self knew what was coming so I blurted out "Not righ tnow!!" Which I think scared her a little bit. But it did mean that she rolled in some of the slack on her leash and did not let her dog wander over so I suppose I accomplished my intent.

Also, I don't understand why people insist on petting Ender when he's all jumpy crazy. Are people not scared when an 80 pound dog is jumping at their face?

Doggy Dining: Philz Coffee

If you coffee lovers are ever in the Bay Area, you MUST go to Philz Coffee. They make coffee by the cup and have over 20 beans on the menu. Their pastries are from local bakeries and the quality FAR FAR exceeds that at Starbucks and PEETs. The only issue I have with them is that there is no line when ordering your coffee. Therefore you just stand in the crowd until a barrista is ready to take an order and hope that you aren't cutting in line or being cut in line. Or non-line. Whatever. Even so, I love their coffee too much to let it deter me. As you can tell, I love me some good coffee.


The store in Berkeley is dog friendly. While I was waiting outside with Barksdale for the bf to order our coffee, the barista came outside to tell us that we are more than welcome to bring dogs inside and brought a little treat for Barksdale as well.

Good Coffee + Dog Friendly? That is why they are number one.

This leads me to my random rant of the day. San Francisco can generally be characterized as a "food city." And the cost of living is really high here. Therefore, nobody really bats an eye at $2.75 cup of coffee. However, I draw the line at paying $2.75 for ridiculousness. You know who sells ridiculousness at $2.75 a pop?

Blue Bottle Coffee.

Therefore, I am officially boycotting all Blue Bottle cafes. For $2.75, here is what I expect:

1. Service
Yes, Blue Bottle, you make coffee by the cup, which might explain the long wait time. However, you should really be tending to my coffee then as opposed to exchanging "witty" quips with your co-worker while I wait.

2. Half and Half/Milk/Cream Options
You only have half and half out. Are you trying to tell me something? That coffee connoisseurs drink their coffee only with half and half? Well guess what, if I am paying you $2.75, I want some damn milk to put in my coffee.

3. Beans
I wanted to buy some beans. I asked if you can grind it for me. You said you guys don't sell beans ground. WTF.

I hate you blue bottle.

When I Wish I Had a Yard

Here are two instances which I are fine examples of when not having a yard sucks:

1. When it's pouring rain outside and your dog refuses to pee at their usual spot, but instead drags you halfway down the block so he can take cover under a bush and then pee.

2. When you are trying to potty train and don't realize that the dog has peed in the stairwell until you are one flight below and feel pee DRIP ON YOUR HEAD.

Camera Shy

One day my co workers and I were discussing the experiences of living with a significant other. For example, when you are on the toilet, do you leave the door open? Is it fine if the other person is brushing their teeth next to you when you are doing your business?

I personally have no problem doing my business or showering with the door open. There are two reasons for this. The first reason is that when we first brought each of the dogs home, we did not leave them unsupervised. Which means if we were in the bathroom, they either had to be in their crate or in my sight. In the mornings, I felt guilty about putting them in their crates when I showered, so I put them in the vanity area and showered with the door open so I can see them. The second is that Ender likes to come into the bathroom and sit in front of you and stare at you while you are sitting on the toilet.

Anywho, on a more random note, Ender poo'd out a giant climp of straw/grass in the morning. It looked like he poo'd out a seaweed salad. Yum.

My New Rug

I just has to wipe Ender's asshole as he was leaving little doodie jewels on my rug.

Dear Neighbor

Perhaps you shouldn't be walking your dog off leash if you have to hold onto him/her when you see us walking down the street.

I am amazed at how many people walk their dogs offleash in our neighborhood. Especially since we live in an urban neighborhood with lots of cars and not in the country where we share a dirt path with the random pick up truck that drives down the road every once in a while. Is it ever okay to walk your dog off leash when you live in an urban neighborhood? And I'm not talking about standing in your front yard with your dog off leash, but like walking with them on the sidewalk, next to passing cars, down the street.

I suppose it's okay if your dog is 100% under voice control. But realistically, how many dogs are 100% under voice control? I interpret 100% to be that your dog comes running to you the second you call it. No repeating the command, no dilly dallying by the dog.

I've often wondered if I had dogs that actually listened to me if I would walk them offleash around the neighborhood. That's when the bf laughs at me and reminds me that I'm genetically predisposed to be the crazy overprotective asian mom that would not hesitate to strap a leash on her future kids, so why would I even consider walking the dogs off leash.

So if a miracle happens and I end up with dogs that are 100% under voice control, you might see them walking around with a monkey backpack.

Getting TOLD at Whole Foods

Yesterday we witnessed a dog owner getting told at Whole Foods. And you know it's bad when you're getting lectured by Whole Foods employees.

We have a fabulous Whole Foods around the corner from us. People often leave their dogs tied up while they go in to shop. This particular owner left their pit tied up right next to the entrance with a loose leash. That dog was NOT a happy camper and proceeded to bark and continue barking.

These were not some sissy barks but some deep and loud barking, which of course caused some concern as this was coming from a pit and the pit was right next to the entrance on a loose lead.

And kudos for Whole Foods employees for paging the owner to customer service. Although I'm pretty sure he waited to PAY for his things before going outside to get the dog.

He did manage to get his comeuppance as we saw the security guard giving him a lengthy lecture while we were on our way out.

I'm not going to lie, before I got the dogs, I totally thought it was my god given right to be able to leave my dog tied up outside. That was quickly crushed after getting a complete spaz aka Ender. The thought of some unsuspecting person trying to pet him was too much to bear.

When we got Barksdale, I thought there was hope. But then I got too paranoid about someone stealing her when too many suspicious characters started showing interest in her.

So now the rule is one person always stays with the dog while the other is the coffee wench.

Overheard at the Vet

"oh my kitty doesn't want to wear an E collar (aka Cone of Shame) because she thinks it is uncomfortable..."

The vet tech handled the comment with grace and suggested she swaddle her kitty like a baby. I realize that I only overheard part of the conversation but I don't know how swaddling is less uncomfortable than an E collar.

Product Review: Revolution

Once in a while, my lack of knowledge about certain things amazes me. For example, during our vet visit yesterday, we were asking the vet about how we are still finding ticks on the dogs even though they are on Revolution. The vet then said that the reason is that Revolution is not a tick preventative.

Let's just say my response was along the lines of WTF?!?! So I am the terrible mother that's been sending Ender out to run around in wilderness without tick prevention. Is this what it feels like when you find out your kid is the one with lice?

Anyway, I remember reading up about Revolution when Ender started coming home with ticks and I DISTINCTLY remember reading something about how Revolution is a tick preventative. Reading their website again, it seems that Revolution controls the American Dog tick, which DOES ME NO GOOD because they are commonly found on the eastern side of the US where I am currently not residing.

Which explains why the vet said that Revolution doesn't control ticks.

We are now back on Frontline and a generic version of Heartguard.

What I understand so far is:

Revolution covers fleas and heartworms, but not ticks for us.
Frontline covers fleas and ticks, but not heartworms so we need generic Heartguard.

We asked the vet what else we could do and she told us about the tick collar but she also said it was highly toxic. Um, okay. That was not a great sell.

Holy Moly

Have you ever seen anything so mythical that you were rendered speechless on the spot? Here is a photo of Ender participating in a group down.

New Dog on The Block

Sometimes my morning walks with Ender feel like running the American Gladiators gauntlet.

1. Walk out the Door
Are the kids down the hall also walking out the door at the same time and therefore running down the hall at Ender yelling "DOGGY DOGGY!!!"?

If the answer is no, proceed with less caution.

2. See Brown Lab across the Street
Do I have the patience to meander behind them or do I need to cross the street and pick my speed up to 3.5 mph?

3. See Husky with Bandanna
Yay! Fellow crazy dog sighting. Know them well enough that if we are walking towards each other, about to cross paths, they or us should go around the other by stepping off the curb and going around the parked car.

4. See Corgi with Woman holding Coffee Mug
Ooooh, medium energy dog. Ender can practice his sit as Corgi walks by. Sad that the owner has failed to realize the greatness of a travel mug.

5. See Brown Pit
Soooo prettyyyyyy...droool. Take note that owner has finally bit the bullet and purchased a prong collar.

6. See new Brown Dog in harness
New crazy dog on the block. Yay. Don't know if owner has realized the true extent of his dog's craziness yet. Will continue to cross street upon sighting.

7. See Rotweiler
OMG, how is it possible that a dog can be this calm? Perfect dog for Ender to practice his sit. Consider asking owner about trade. Two crazy pits for your one calm and sweet Rottie?

8. See Small Dogs that Live in Building
$&@#($&#(*&#*&)!!!!!! I think every small dog that lives in our building has a napoleon complex.

Dog Blogs

I like looking at photos of dogs. I especially like it when it's followed by some funny commentary.

Enter the DogBlog.

Product Review: Furmintator Update

Here is a photo of week 3:



Here is a photo of week 4:



The conclusion is that Ender is one hairy mofo. But after being furminated, he's now svelte and sexy. Although now I'm questioning whether or not we are feeding him enough because he's looking so skinny without his extra fur.

Coffee Mugs

I've seen several people walking their dogs in the morning holding coffee mugs. Not travel coffee mugs. But straight up sitting in your house drinking coffee coffee mugs. I often wonder what makes people think this is a good idea.

I've seen a lady spill her coffee because her little dog wanted to chase after Ender and I've seen a lady stand on the corner trying to figure out how to pick up her dog's poo with her coffee mug in her hand.

What the heck.

Prouct Review: Furminator

I've seen this product around but held out on purchasing it because it was so damn expensive. After using it, the conclusion is, why the hell did I wait so long?



When we first got Ender I thought, oh cool, he'll be a low maintenance dog since his hair is so short. Let's just say not having Golden Retriever or German Shepard hair doesn't always mean low maintenance. I came to this realization one day when we were walking and I saw his hair start flying off his ass. So three brushes and one very convincing saleslady later, I finally broke down and shelled out the bucks for the Furminator. It is sooooooooooooo awesome.

Below is the hair I got off of Ender his first session, and I only stopped because he started getting bored. Note that I spent about half an hour, used minimal force, and that Ender had been washed and brushed two days before. (And yes, this is what I do Saturday night folks, I go buy grooming tools and use them on the dog.)



The saleslady said when she first started using it on her dog, she initially started off with sessions every other day to get the bulk of the hair off so now she just does it for maintenance. We purchased the Long Hair Medium Dog Furminator. The description says that it's for long hair dogs 21-50 lbs, and although Ender is about 80-90 lbs, we bought this one because the saleslady said it would be easier to contour to the bumps and crevices of his body. The best thing about it is that it has this little tab that pushes the hair out of the teeth of the comb. That means I don't have to spend forever trying to get the fur off the brush so I can brush him some more. Awesome.

Self Esteem Booster

Sometimes to make myself feel better, I like to visit the website Shit My Pets Ruined. It's quite funny. And I get a self esteem boost from seeing that other people also have crazy pets. Then I got to thinking about what our pets have ruined. They are pretty good, but again we also don't give them many chances to ruin our stuff. So I guess me saying pretty good is akin to saying...oh he got out of prison early for good behavior. Because really, you're in prison, how much trouble can you really get into? Anyway, I digress.

In the sentiment of the website, here is a list of top five things that I can remember the dogs ruining (besides my food):

1. Sunglasses. Okay, so these were like a $12 pair of sunglasses from Ross so I wasn't too mad.

2. Rug. After countless pee accidents, it finally bit the dust after Barksdale chewed a second bald spot in it.

3. Remote Control. Ender only got so far as to nibble on the corner before he got caught. We have since upgraded to a bigger tv so, no hard feelings.

4. Crate. Barksdale destroyed her crate while she was being boarded. Crate replacement = $100+. All together now...?!?!?#&(*&#)!*#)!(*

5. Uggs. Ender still gets excited to see me at the end of the day. Like seriously, did he forget me over the course of 8 hrs? Anyway, usually when I come home, he likes to run to get a toy and prance around the living room. During one particular incident, the bf met me at the BART station with Ender and apparently the closest thing to a toy were the Uggs ON MY FEET. While sniffing and mouthing my right foot, he must have poked a hold in my shoe, which I found the next day. Let's just say he came pretty close to getting returned after that incident. Although he probably knows now that if he ever tries to mouth my Uggs again, he's probably going to be getting a swift kick in the ass.

Ticks Round 2

Two days ago, I found a HELLA big tick on Ender. I noticed it on his morning walk when I was picking up his poo. All I saw was a giant round blob on his side and upon poking at it and looking at it more carefully, I realized that it was a gigantic bug of some kind. Below is a photo with my thumb for reference - intentionally slightly fuzzy for the faint of heart (ahem, bf, ahem). It is currently chilling in some of bf's scotch. (Note to self, buy rubbing alcohol for more efficient tick drowning.)



Apparently when ENGORGED (full of blood), ticks can increase to size GINORMOUS. Randomly, besides tweezers, another awesome essential tick removal item is antiseptic wipes. When I first started yanking ticks off the dogs, the bite would be super lumpy the following days. But with the antiseptic wipes, the bite is usually less lumpy the next day. Go modern medicine.

Besides finding this ginormous beast, I've had to pull ticks off of Ender and Barksdale's butts. I'm pretty sure that's the closest I will come to playing russian roulette.

Ender Has No Friends - Part 2

Notice that all the other dogs are standing there perfectly calm and still.

Report Card

After two hours in traffic, I come home to this:

"Ender rolled in some stinky animal poo. I hosed him off (it was mostly on his neck.) But you might not want to cuddle him tonight! Sorry..."

I swear he rolls in poo every few weeks. I think I will start calling him Dookiehead, as it might be more fitting than Ender.

UPDATE: I took Ender out for the evening and he just peed on his leg. WTF.

Lazy Ender Take Back

Just kidding. New evidence shows that Ender is still as spazzy as ever. I find it quite sad that nobody wants to play with him. However, I found him annoying even while watching this video so I guess it is slightly understandable.

Lazy Ender

One of my New Years resolutions was to be a better doggy mama. Part of that entails me taking the doggies on more adventures on the weekends as opposed to sitting on the couch and watching tv all day. During these adventures, I began to realize that Ender has gotten pretty lazy in his old age. We would try to play fetch with him, only to have him go lay down after about three throws. Granted that he has always been a bit ambivalent towards us, this lack of activity made us wonder if he even moves at all during his walks. Evidence also shows that he enjoys his "lay down time."



Ender's dogwalker, Lucia, titled this next photo:

"Ender was ignoring Ursula today for his stick. She was not happy about that."


All photos courtesy of awesome dog walker Lucia.

It's been that kind of morning...

Ender and I were on our morning walk when I stopped in front of a driveway to practice one of our exercises. I am working on training our dogs so that when I stop walking, they stop, sit, and look at me. So as Ender sat and looked at me, I hear a deep voice saying "excuse me ma'am."

I literally stared at Ender and thought...wow, if Ender could talk, that would be EXACTLY what he would sound like. Then I hear the voice again and at this point, it was feeling a bit twilight zone-esque, until I realize that the voice was coming from a neighbor who was standing behind me, who's driveway we were blocking.

Is there such a thing?

I saw a commercial for Confessions: Animal Hoarding on the Discovery Channel today. The title of their next episode is "Too Many Pitbulls." Now, I ask, is there such a thing? Haha. Here's the info for the episode:

Too Many Pitbulls
Premieres Friday, Jan. 28, at 10 PM E/P
A single dad believes he's on a mission from God to save pit bulls and a woman tries to stop her stubborn mother's cat hoarding before she ends up homeless. Follow Shane and Sharon as they come to grips with the perils of hoarding animals.

Onto other smells...

Over the past two days, Ender has been farting up a storm. In my googling efforts, I came across something that was too enlightening to keep to myself:

Why are stinky farts generally warmer and quieter than regular farts?

Most fart gas comes from swallowed air and consists largely of nitrogen and carbon dioxide, the oxygen having been absorbed by the time it reaches the anal opening. These gases are odorless, although they often pick up other (and more odiferous) components on the way through the bowel. They emerge from the anus in fairly large bubbles at body temperature. A person can often achieve a good sound with these voluminous farts, but they are commonly (but not always!) mundane with respect to odor, and don't feel particularly warm.

Another major source of fart gas is bacterial action. Bacterial fermentation and digestion processes produce heat as a byproduct as well as various pungent gases. The resulting bubbles of gas tend to be small, hot, and concentrated with stinky bacterial metabolic products. These emerge as the notorious, warm, SBD (Silent-But-Deadly), often in amounts too small to produce a good sound, but excelling in stench.

courtesy of Facts on Farts

What's that Smell?

We came home to a strong odor today. And it wasn't one of those hits you in the face, oh sh*t odors. But a strong, sickly sweet odor...like Maple Syrup?!?!? So then I google "dog smells like maple syrup" and to my surprise, there was more than one search result. So from what I gather, it would be from running through plants during his doggy adventure, treats he's been eating, or he's peeing out maple syrup. But thanks to this lovely post, I think it might just be the plants:

http://girlshikingwithdogs.blogspot.com/2010/03/my-dog-smells-like-maple-syrup.html

Hey Everybody, Walk Time!

Here's the bf with a pack of crazies. Every now and then, we consider quitting our day jobs to walk doggies all day. That is until I find myself with more than two dogs and realize how mentally exhausting it really is.

Why meeeee???

Ender probably asks this everyday. Sometimes more than one day.

Soft Crate

When Barksdale was just a little puppy, the bf took her to work everyday. She soon grew out of her mini plastic crate and was doing so well we bought her a soft crate. We were attracted to the portability but failed to realize that Barksdale would soon come to realize her inner crazy and try to destroy the crate from the inside out.

The Joys of Winter

One joy of winter is the month long winter break at UC Berkeley which results in available parking and a giant fenced in field to run around in.